FAIRBANKS - Strange things keep seeping out from the Alaska Panhandle. It might have something to do with the rain, but between the savagely surrealistic artwork of Ray Troll, the recent publication of an entire book devoted to XTRATUF boots, and the never ending antics of the Legislature, one can understandably conclude that things are a bit askew down that way.

Now we have “Real Alaskan Magazine” coming out of Juneau to add to the list of things — including the Legislature — that exist purely for the purpose of mocking our state. “Real Alaskan” is the brainchild (so to speak) of Jeff Brown. You might not know his name, but you’ve probably bought at least one of his postcards. He’s one of the guys behind that series of black and white classics like “Greetings from the Anchorage Municipal Landfill,” and “On the Road to Tok” that were wildly popular up here in the ’80s and ’90s.

“Real Alaskan” takes the format of “Alaska Magazine” and makes it, well, really Alaskan. This is why you’ll find, among other things, a pictorial tribute to “The Scenic Parklands of Alaska” that shows parking lots from 13 Alaskan communities, a story on a mountain bike rider who traverses rivers and cliffs in her daily commute, and an article on the finer points of collecting moose nuggets for use in souvenirs.

“Real Alaskan” is published annually on April 1, appropriately enough, and the two issues thus far released (both are still available) provide some of the best northern humor around. The magazines offer comical takes on life from all corners of the Last Frontier (“a land as vast as its vastness,” as Brown puts it on the opening page of the first issue), focusing on such uniquely Alaskan pastimes as surfing the inside of the pipeline, mowing a field of muskeg, and fishing salmon out of the potholes on the Alcan.

Brown takes us to Homer for the annual Spit-Off, over to the Southeast for the Haines Beagle Fest, and to Fairbanks, where a state SWAT team pursues renegade mosquitoes.

Other feature articles explore how scientists use high-powered electrical generators to produce the northern lights for viewers’ pleasure, the efforts of a specialized maintenance crew that cleans glaciers, and the annual “Running of the Bears” footrace through downtown Juneau.

These magazines are a lot of fun, and wherever you’ve lived in the state, you’re bound to find something that hits close to home. Brown has an exceptionally keen eye for the idiosyncrasies that characterize life in the northland, and he sees the inherent humor in virtually everything.

The magazines succeed for a variety of reasons beyond just the writing and graphics. First and foremost, Brown has largely kept it clean. Where a lot of people in this day would litter such a publication with off color — if not downright obscene — material, Brown keeps it family-friendly (one quick Viagra joke is as far over the line as he goes, and the drug’s television advertisements are far more tasteless). You can buy these magazines for an elderly grandmother or a 10-yearold kid and not worry about the content.

They also work because Brown’s humor is gently satirical but never cruel. He pokes fun at Alaskans of every stripe, but he doesn’t hit below the belt. And he doesn’t rely on that old standby, Sarah Palin, either. She only gets a few brief mentions, and none of them belittling. These days it’s not easy to find something that’s genuinely funny yet doesn’t go out of its way to be offensive, and Brown deserves extra kudos for pulling it off.

Another highlight is the advertisements. Lots of them are staged, but quite a few come from actual businesses that have subsidized this magazine with ads that are every bit as funny as the editorial content. Early in the first issue, an ad for a Juneau import shop shouts out, “Nothing says Real Alaskan more than a hat from Ecuador” (and if you don’t think this true, hoof it over to Lulu’s Bagels and check out the clientele).

Valley Auto Parts (another Juneau establishment) recommends Alaska Fish Oil for engine lubrication in one issue, and running your engine on rain in the next.

Ludvig’s Bistro in Sitka trumpets the horrible pun, “We never Mediterranean we didn’t like.” Weather Permitting Alaska promotes “whale washing” tours. And the best one of all comes from Capitol Copy, which introduces us to its Psychic Home Radiant Heat posters in a piece that brilliantly sends up those Amish home heating miracle ads that no one in their right mind believes are honest.

“Real Alaskan” is a slickly produced magazine printed on high quality paper that looks for all the world like a legitimate publication, even as it skewers the most popular periodical on Alaska currently published. Like “Alaska Magazine,” “Real Alaskan” includes sporting news, tourist information, “historic” photographs, archival highlights, and even obituaries, all done with a twist that will keep real Alaskans (and those who wish they were) chuckling the whole way through.

There’s plenty more to be found here as well, and while not every joke works, enough of them do to make both issues of this magazine well worth their asking prices.

The latest issue of “Real Alaskan Magazine” can be found in Fairbanks at Gulliver’s Books and at Twigs Alaskan Gifts in the Airport. Both issues can also be had for $10 each, postpaid, from Jeff Brown, 214 Dixon Street, Juneau, AK 99801.

Freelance writer David A. James lives in Fairbanks.
Real Alaskan Magazine

Edited by Jeff Brown

$10

www.alaska.net/~jbrown/ Jeff-Home/ Real-Alaskan. html