Letter to the Editor
Child safety
Published Thursday, May 15, 2008
May 7, 2008
To the editor:
My husband and I were backing out of our parking space at Wal-Mart, when suddenly a little toddler, no more than 3 years old, ran right behind our vehicle. Thankfully, we were able to stop, but what really ticked me off is that her father scooped her up as she was giggling and he didn’t even acknowledge that his child could have been killed.
We pulled out and had to maneuver around all these pedestrians. Little kids walking in the middle of the road, while their mom walks in the middle of the road 10 feet behind talking on her cell phone.
Remember the good old days when pedestrians looked both ways before crossing a road? Now they just assume that they have the right of way and vehicles will stop.
When I was a kid, you walked off to the side to allow vehicles to go by, but not anymore.
So we go to Chili’s for dinner, and as we are walking in, a very young girl — not even school age — comes running out and right into traffic. I about fainted. Then an older girl, maybe 8 or so, catches up to her and drags her back in the restaurant, where their mom and dad are calmly waiting to be seated.
Wake up people! If you don’t teach your children about traffic safety and you don’t practice safety in parking lots and on busy streets, then it will end in tragedy.
Not only is it about safety but also courtesy. If vehicles did not have to worry about pedestrians as much, traffic could flow better and people could park easier. What would it really cost you to walk off to the side of traffic and hold your little one’s hands?
Community Discussion
Newsminer.com doesn't necessarily condone the comments here, nor does it review every post. Read our full user's agreement.
I agree that this is a huge problem. The worst are the parents who can't hold their child's hand because they "need" to smoke.
mushermommy .... give me a break about the smoking .... get a life for yourself. I don't smoke but that is a really stupid comment.
Be realistic ... don't use the term parents so loosely. Breeders is more like it. Most don't have much interest in their kids, just talk, and 95% of them don't and never will supervise them because they don't have the proper training themselves. The kid was lucky in this instance because these folks were paying attention …. The dad just needs his **** rearranged so his brains have some room to think.
Hey mushermommy, How about we go to dinner at Food Factory.
Your silly comment just makes you look pathetic, since I was posting a concern for the way children are not showing any safety habits while running around in traffic.
And by the way, it takes one hand to smoke, the other can hold a child's hand. DUH...
James, thank you for your comment. Now if everybody else will get on board before any children get hurt.
Aughh, the old smoker nerve has been struck. Remeber it takes one hand to smoke the other to hold the yungin's hand and the the smoke to do its deadly duty.
It looks like mushermommy does have a life, a much longer one due to not smoking I would guess.
Breeders = great band too!
YouMustBConfused
Tammy,
When you talked to the offending parents, what was their response?
You did confront the behavior didn't you?
Okay, I can see the point of concern but at the same time YOU ARE IN A PARKING LOT! Of course you had to drive around pedestrians, it is not Salcha, it is the parking lot at a store that has half of the parking scrambled due to the construction on their building. Just to further the point, Chili's is at the back of the same parking lot.
Yes, parents do need to teach there kids safety. Do I expect a parent to run out after the little girl and admonish the child just because it startled you? So many people look at you as if they work at child enforcement when you raise your voice at your child in public, did you expect a show just so you felt they where paying attention? Do you know if the child had a stern talking to once back inside with the parents? I have a ten year old daughter and a seven year old daughter; if the seven year old did that (she would get in trouble, no doubt) and my oldest was the CLOSEST to reaching her, she would have pulled her sister over and I would have chewed her butt the second she got to me! Parenting is not a perfect science, you have to do the best you can and not every situation is going to be a public display just so the neighbors feel better.
JB: I think this is my favorite posting you've ever done.
Our family consists of two kids and two parents. One kid for each parent or one kid for each of one parents hands. No room for phones, smokes or other distractions. All personal choices aside, parenting is the responsibility of raising children to become productive citizens. Our kids are now mid teens and we are working very hard on creating old fashioned gentlemen. A most difficult task I can assure you. Our children learn more from example than by directions. Show them how to be great people and they will become terrific adults.
Not only can your child be ran over but this is how they are snatched by kidnappers. Even if your child is in your own back yard they should be supervised. I know I will get blasted for this one but if I have to keep my dog on a leash for his safety maybe you should keep your child on a leash for theirs.
wow. I agree that kids should be supervised....but what a way off comment. What do you expect in a parking lot. people to fly across. As drivers and walkers BOTH should watch their ways. Just becasue your driving doesnt mean you have the right away.
And don't forget to keep your children in a cage, too, right, Alaskastoryteller? After all, it's for their own good.
After four kids and now a foster, I've learned a few things...and witnessed more than I am comfortable with. So many comments ring true on this thread. The foremost being parent to parent contact. Confrontation doesn't have to be negative (nor should it be), choose your words wisely, but SPEAK UP! Lead with a positive, after all aren't we all truly concerned about what we perceive to be a potentially dangerous situation? I am not at all uncomfortable interceding when I witness a faux pau. Although it has taken practice. I even give a wink, a nod and a kudos to parents who ARE admonishing their child (not abusive behavior, which I have also tried to schmooz). I even take the time to let the child know "wow, you're a lucky kid, you have a mommy (or daddy) who really loves you". This approach has never backfired.
The greatest quote I ever heard is..."as mothers we cradle them under our hearts for the first nine months of their existence and spend the rest of our lives teaching them how to live without us".
Mrs S
Mrs. S.,
As a parent of a 3 year-old who loves to make a break for it (the world is such an exciting place when you're 3!), I would appreciate your giving me a wink, a nod or kudos while I am scolding her little rear for her behavior. And I would certainly appreciate your saying to her that she's a lucky kid to have a mommy who really loves her!
Outside of handcuffs, there's no guarantee that a toddler or smaller child won't take off running, scaring the dickens out of parents and/or drivers. It doesn't surprise me either that some parents are negligent or wouldn't even notice, although it frustrates me.
I would be the parent with hair sticking out everywhere, swinging her arms and frantically chasing that toddler (altho' that probably adds to her excitement--until I catch up with her)!
Excellent comment MrsSaenz! I too am a mother of three and an active foster parent. I think we are jumping to dangerous conclusions when we assume (we all know what this leads to) what someone is or isn't doing with their children. If you are concerned then by all means speak up but in a positive and respectful manner, I think you will be amazed at your results. I have many a time reached out and stopped a child (not my own) from running into traffic or even alerted a parent to a child standing in a grocery cart, or some other unsafe behavior, etc. I find that the majority of parents appreciate the assistance and I in turn would appreciate someone doing the same for my children. I know I am not perfect and neither are my children but I will promise you that if you limit the number of distractions while out and about you will have far less to worry about :)
The parents that don't pay attention to their children, are usually the ones we see in the emergency room feeling guilty and crying because they weren't paying attention to their children. yes, you SHOULD supervise your child EVEN in your own back yard, Anyone watch America Most wanted??? There are predators ALL OVER. If you look online at the convicted sex offenders in our town alone, you might surprise yourself. Your child is YOUR responsibility. It saddens me to see such LACK of that, not only here but everywhere. Children don't come with instructions, It is US who teaches them. They don't know not to run off from mom and dad UNLESS mom and dad TELL THEM NOT TO! I have a 4 year old myself. They can definitely get away from you and quick. As parents be on your toes and pay attention to your baby! Thats your flesh and blood. Take care of them!
As a parent, and now a grandparent, I find these posts insightful and amazing. When my children were small, they held my hand (or their dad's) when walking anywhere. What's wrong with that? I saw a young child running through the Safeway on College Road a number of years ago. When I attempted to stop her, the mother about had a fit at me because I tried to interfere with that child's expression of anger! What the heck? Our society has taught us, unfortunately, to stay out of something that is not our business. I find it remorseful that we, as a "society" cannot raise a child to adulthood without having to worry about that child calling the police simply because we tried to help them. Sometimes the old ways are the better ways.
I don't EXPECT people to be courteous in public, though it would be nice. But the next time your going through your busy life, just stop and watch. See how many people bother to look both ways or even take notice of their surroundings.
I simply made an observation. If you agree, that's great. If you don't then ignore the problem of child safety.
I don't care about your smoking, this is not the thread for that discussion. Do you understand the phrase "Stay on topic"?
As far as confrontation... No, I did not confront them. For 2 reasons: 1)Confrontation can lead to deadly results and 2)I happen to be in a wheelchair these days and by the time I would have gotten the chair out, got put in the chair and pushed into Walmart, I would have never found them. I didn't get a good look at them. (Hubby NEVER confronts anyone - so don't even go there. He grew up where people would shoot you just as well as look at you.)
However, after reading some of these posts, I realize that maybe I should have. At the time, though, I was so frustrated and shocked.
So, I probably could not have been very positive.
It would really be nice if people would just educate their kids about safety in general.
JB--'what do you expect you were in a parking lot?' What does that mean? Does it mean that people are excused from letting their kids run in a parking lot?
I am a mother and if my child acts out in public--I don't care who is watching I am going to discipline my child. If the child has done something to endanger themeselves, it would result in more of a reaction from me. Tammy--I understand and agree with you that we as parents are here to teach our children how to survive as adults. In the meantime you should teach your children about common courtesy to others. So, if they run out in front of someone's car and scare the Bleep out of them---then you stand there and tell them how sorry you are that that happened.
If each person in society would respect each other, rather than think only of themselves the world would be a better place. Pedestrians need to be more cautious of drivers and drivers need to do the same. Everyone is always in such a hurry to do things, that nothing else matters but their own agenda.
I am a breeder of 3 litters bearing one child each time. I try my hardest to teach them right from wrong, but unfortunately I am not perfect. I teach them the rules of life and also I teach them values. Values is the key word here. So many people are filled with hate and contempt and it really saddens me that my children have to be raised in a society of such hatered. Maybe if we could all learn to coexist and learn how to walk and/or drive in a parking lot then it might be the start to peace in our world.
Dead horse, here's my foot.
countrygirl- "Hey mushermommy, How about we go to dinner at Food Factory."
First off I don't even understand that comment.
"Your silly comment just makes you look pathetic, since I was posting a concern for the way children are not showing any safety habits while running around in traffic."
Every event you posted about a child running out near your vehicle was accompanied by telling us where the parents were. I don't hold a three year old to fully comprehend safty habits. I'd imagine your letter is more a critical writing about parenting skills. That parents should be with their children. I must have been mislead by the style of your writing. "your little one's hand" "you don’t teach your children" My mistake. The letter was obviously meant for the children. I shall read it tonight for a bedtime story.
"And by the way, it takes one hand to smoke, the other can hold a child's hand. DUH..."
Just because a parent smokes doesn't mean that they think it is a healthy habit to do around children. I know many families that go outside to smoke. And they do not walk with their children when smoking.
I think it is funny you made a personal attack against me when I said I agreed it was a problem. Say what you want but I have defended my position and I won't be writing anymore about this letter. But I'm sure I have made your hit list and if I post on a future letter I will face more insults from you.
Lagirl- no it does not mean free for all with the parking lot. it meant there are lots of people walking through a parking lot and the letter made it sound as if the person driving the car should be able to 'drive', not be cautious (spelling?) of being in a parking lot. i could be holding my kids hand and still have a near hit due to vision lines from a mirror or over the shoulder. I have almost been hit by a car in a parking lot and I am almost six foot, not under four foot. It means you are in a parking lot, wake up!
How many of you have seen vehicles out there drive through those parking lots like it's a Race Track having to go as fast as they can like they just received a 911 call or something?
Having raised 3 children to adulthood and now raising another one, believe me I hold on tight, look not only both ways, but all the way around me and proceed with caution until I'm safely home.
I didn't mean that children are uncontrollable by the leash comment. I have two grown children and 6 grandchildren and know that they do intend to want to stretch their legs at times.
I attended training with the Center for Missing and Exploited Children and learned that a child disappears every 5 minutes. Isn't better to be safe than sorry.
JB--I must be thick headed! I still don't see the relevance between parking lots and teaching your kid saftey anywhere around vehicles. I get the fact that the parking lots are dangerous no matter how careful you are being, but that was not the point of this letter. Teaching your kids and obviously adults saftey was the point. SO WAKE UP!
Heres another case of the older person forgetting what it was like to be young because it's been so long right? Whatever happened to pedestrians having the right of way?
Here we go again trying to figure out who has the right of way! After reading the threads on the NM it is amazing more people don't get hurt, because everyone thinks they are correct when it comes to right of way! :)
Mushermommy, Never mind - my comments were obviously over your head - I apologize.
I think that teaching kids safety is important - if I'm wrong then let your kids play russian roulette with their lives - it's your choice.
Pedestrians may have the right of way - but would it kill them to walk out of the way when possible? Has common courtesy become extinct?
People shouldn't drive at unsafe speeds no matter where they are.
Anyway I've voiced an opinion that in some way has offended people. That was not my goal. Like an idiot, I thought everyone would think parent responsibility and child safety were important.
I just hope and pray that I'm not in the vehicle that can't stop suddenly enough for your child that was simply not taught to Stop, Look, and Listen.
This is amazing! Right away is not a factor!!!! A pedestrian may have the right of way, but when it comes to making a mistake... it's not worth my life. I'm not going to take a chance of getting hit by a car because "I had the right away"! It's not worth the loss of a limb, permanent injury, or death. The CAR will always win!!! If your child gets hit because of your negligence to keep them under control... the drive will have to live with that mistake (no matter the fault) for the rest of their life... and so will you! Grow up and stop being stubborn. Right away or not... protect the safety of your children... and don't put their lives in danger because you think you're right!!! GOOD GRIEF!
Reading all the positive comments helps offset the bickering. Granted kids are kids and parents are parents. None of us is foolproof. My son rode right out in front of a car on his bike 8 years ago. I nearly died. My first instict was to run in front of the car to block the car from my son, nut shamefully I just froze.
Fortunately, the car was not going very fast and stopped on a dime. There was no yelling, solely tears of thankfulness my son was alive. Of course we discussed the danger with my boy, but I was standing right there with him and outta the blue he just rode in front of that car.
Agreeing 100% keep a hold of your toddlers hand, and please go slow in any parking lot because kids are kids.
Post a comment
Commenting requires registration.